Lessons from my daughter #037

“Why must I sleep by myself when you can sleep with daddy?”

SO clever.

Raeven is a product of about over two years of co-sleeping. It wasn’t initially by choice, but became one eventually. When Raeven was born, we lived in a small room in my husband’s family home. Because there were no other rooms, we had no place to build a nursery or even place a crib. As such, Raeven slept in between us from the day she returned from the hospital.

Now there’ve been quite a few friends who’ve discouraged that practice, citing fears such as sudden infant death to the child never leaving your bed until she’s 16 or something. Fortunately, there was the Internet, and I did some research on my own. Turns out that co-sleeping is actually encouraged, either on your bed or in a crib in your room, for newborns and parents to develop some of that bonding love, as well as to facilitate nursing. And kids will slowly but surely learn to sleep on their own.

Today, Raeven is 3.5 years old. We started training her to sleep by herself in our old bed (yes, the bed she has been sleeping in since she was a wee baby) when she was over two. We did up the second room in our new home and started by taking turns between Lokes and me to sleep with her and then leaving her to sleep the rest of the night. She loved her new pink room and wanted to spend as much time as she could in it, which was good. Meant our plan was working. Eventually, she got the idea. Our baby had grown up. In fact, mommy and daddy had some trouble letting go of the fact that our little girl would not be sleeping in between us anymore.

These days, because of Skyler, Raeven is back to co-sleeping with first my mom, who spent a year taking care of Sky for me, and then now either me or Lokes, simply because there was, again, insufficient room. Yesterday, I tried explaining to her that when we move to Seattle next month, she would have to sleep on her own again.

Which was when she popped that question. How to answer?

I think it will still be a while before Raeven will ever sleep alone again, simply because space is, and will in the forseeable future be, a problem. Perhaps it was just meant to be!



1 Comment »

  1. Asther said

    I think I slept in my parents room till my younger brother turned 3 (so that’ll make me 7 yr old!) Then, both bro and I started sharing another room next door. When we moved back to our hometown, my bro got his own room but I’ve to share with my aunty. Space problem in the house because my grandma and aunty are staying with us.

    Now, I’ve to admit I hate sleeping alone even till this moment. But occassionally I do wish I’ve my own bed without having to share with anybody. Hehehe… Mainly, I just don’t like to be alone at night. Not sure if it’s due to my childhood co-sharing days or not. Hmmmm???

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