Archive for May, 2006

This is the way we milk the cow

So here I am, watching Larry King Live.

And there's no Larry King.

Instead, there's Ryan Seacrest, in his seat, interviewing Taylor Hicks, Katharine McPhee and Randy Jackson. Well, it was more like patting each other on their backs over and over again. A little disgusting, and yet, I wanna go on watching. I call it car-wreck fascination.

How can you still call it Larry King Live when the man himself isn't even there? There's the familiar retro background. There's the table and the chairs. But no Larry King.

Isn't that a little – I dunno – fraudulent?

They should just call it "Larry King's Set, Live".

Pfff.

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What moms live for

"Mommy, you're the best mom!"

Just five little words that strike such emotion in one's heart.

Here we were, having breakfast and I was just flying around the kitchen getting juice and bread and cheese and what not, when suddenly, Raeven looks at me, face smudged with peanut butter and she had on that very serious yet soft look that I now associate with whenever she feels glad to have me around.

"Mommy, you're the best mom!"

Being the wreck that I am, my eyes glistened and I stopped for a moment.

"Why, sweetie that's a really nice thing to say. You're the best little girl too, baby."

"You sing with me, and dance with me, and play with me. I love you mommy," she said, without skipping a beat on that peanut butter sandwich.

You can imagine how I felt just for that few seconds. That all the screaming and yelling and worrying has not gone to waste. I am indeed raising a loving, caring individual.

And then, from the far corner of the room, the smell of fresh, morning poop comes wafting. Skyler, mouth twisted in bowel moving concentration, tries to smile but it is lost in the forces of mother nature.

Welp, that was one meaningful moment. Thanks, my sweetpeas.

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Teaching kids about rejection

Raeven is a relatively sensitive kid. Like me, she tends to take a lot of things to heart, such as when kids do not respond to her or play with her as they will with their own friends.

Since I enrolled her at the preschool, Rae has learnt to play together with other kids, as opposed to when she was in Malaysia at the Montessori school, where she would just play alongside her classmates. She has learned to interact with her environment much more, perhaps because the children here are friendlier and more open to interaction, I don't know. As such, she has learned to 'make friends', which in her world, means someone who would talk to her or hold her hand when she offers it.

With acceptance comes rejection, and I myself have been puzzling in the last few months over how to explain to her why some kids won't respond to her offers of friendship sometimes. For instance, her 'boyfriend' Cody, which since Camp Gilead has been really friendly to her, has now moved on to his other friends, whereas Rae sees him as her 'best friend'. When he did not hold her hand or play with her as much (he still does, just not as much today compared to two weeks ago, you know how kids are), Rae was noticeably hurt and could not understand or deal with the situation.

Similarly, the ten-year old son of one of our neighbours, who had played with her twice at the playground, naturally prefers to play with kids his age. She sees that as rejection as well, and is hurt by his choice.

After much discussion with Lokes and some research (you will notice there aren't many articles online that talk about this), I started to talk to Rae about the importance of having friends, and lots of them. I'm not sure if this is the right thing to do, really, so if any of you can share with me how you got your child to deal with these facts of life, I'd most appreciate it. I only know that it's important to keep the concept very simple, and she seems to understand now that when one child does not want to play with her, she can always play with others. As such, in school, she has begun to 'make' more friends, and we talk about this everyday, where I ask her who she's made friends with today and so on. It really gives me some relief to know that she's forgotten about how hurt she was when Cody would not play with her, and seem to have moved on.

Going through this stage of her growth, I thought about how I dealt with rejection when I was in school. Of course, I can't remember when it was that I first experienced it, but it must've been horrid, and to have noone explain to me why it had to happen. I feel truly blessed to be able to go through this with Raeven, and to let her know that people out there in the world may reject her, but that her mommy and daddy will always be there for her, no matter what.

So to anyone of you experiencing this, talk to your child. Teach them about the importance of having more than one friend, and to know that whatever happens, mommy and daddy will always be their 'friends'.

And you know you can never tell them that enough, because there will come a time when their 'real' friends will be more important.

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Is this leading somewhere?

While watching her cartoons, a commercial, as too many of these do, came on selling Floam, which is really quite cute. At the end of the commercial, a number came on and the announcer said, "You must be 18 or above to call".

Cue Raeven.

Rae: Mommy, how old are you?
Mommy: Err…I'm 33. And why?
Rae: *gives me a big grin* Are you over 18?
Mommy: Yes, 33 is much older than 18. Why?
Rae: *chuckling* Then you can call and buy Floam so we can make a T-rex!

She is STILL watching too much TV!

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The simplest answers

It was bedtime, and usually, after the stories, I will spend some time cuddling with Rae and talking to her.

One of yesterday's little conversations went like this:

Rae: Cody likes to come near me and hug me tight tight (face wasn't very happy – Rae doesn't like too close contact with anyone except her dad, for some reason. Even I can't hug or kiss her without asking nicely first or she will get annoyed)
Mommy: Why do you think he likes to do that?
Rae: Because I'm right there!

Well, that explains everything.

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A piece of home in Starbucks

Being homesick can be a rather haphazard experience.

This morning, I had a bitter sweet moment, seeing a piece of home at the Starbucks in Redmond Town Center, only to be loudly told that I could not take a picture of their drinks board by this curt young lady who just kept cutting me off when I tried to just tell her (while already putting my phone away) why I wanted to. She wasn't interested and just kept telling me, "No, I know. But no."

Never mind that there were 50 people in there and I had a grumbly baby with me. I mean, come on. I just wanted to take a pic of the board with this on it.

What really frightened me was what followed. While this was just a little thing, really, and I should know better, but as I drove home, I felt tears well up and became sadder than I'd ever been since we moved to Seattle. To suddenly realise I am now the farthest away from home than I'd ever been, without Lokes and with two kids, without anyone who really cared about us should that's within a day's trip away.

The fact just weighed down on me I could feel my heart just literally sink like a stone to the bottom of a really deep place.

For all the opportunities this new move presents, I just wished the part where you feel all alone and homesick and scared can be over sooner.

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Bizarre American Idol finals

I have a question: how come my best friend in Malaysia, Hazel, said that they aired the American Idol finals there at their time 8am, which is 5pm here in Seattle, when the show is only showing 'live' in LA (no time diff between LA and Seattle) at 8pm? They got it like three hours early?!

And news of the results were out like an hour ago before the show was 'live'?!

And what on EARTH happened to Meatloaf????

But who cares? TAYLOR HICKS WON!! YES! Perky boobs and tired good looks, eat your heart out!

And can I just say that Prince is so effin' hot I almost fainted from screaming like a mad ass alone in my house with the kids asleep? I swear if he ever comes to Seattle I am SO groupie-ing him.

And if you're gonna read a REAL report about the evening, try washingpost's blow-by-blow. I promise you, it's hilarious. I salute you, Lisa. You are goddess of lightning-quick sark.

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